requiem for the unrequited

hello child what do you know
you said you've been to hell but you were not even close
if that was hell child, what do you call the places I'd been
beyond purgatory sweetpea,
beyond anything your small cherry mind could ever imagine

pink bubbly cuddly you were chosen to be
you said you'd seen death but honey,
you have never been burned alive
death is ultimate I know but pain is eternal
so don't compare, don't you even go there

glorious child how sweet for you to try to understand
but a mind like mine works in ways you will never ever comprehend
no matter how you struggle, or try to get smarter
deciphering dreams from a broken soul would never get any easier

so could you please do me a little favor
I need you to never engage me in any conversation
ah don't get me wrong sweet child it's not jealousy I feel
like cheese and chalk, some things are just never meant to be

a plethora of old time creativity

borrowed love

take one day at a time
take moment after moment
take life as it comes
it's time to heal a heart that's broken

take away my dreams and wishes, everything
until they come to a complete nothing
simply nothing
take time for reflecting
it's time to heal a heart that's broken

life goes up and down in high and sorrow
the only hope to hold is tomorrow
it's time
it's time to heal a heart that's broken
it's time to return the love that I borrowed

my devil's army

love that loves me too much
love that leaves love that lies
love that betrays
love that is no longer there
forever that is cut short
everlasting that does not last
unspoken intention, twisted logic and justification
the true meaning behind the eyes
spoken words sugarcoated with black and white lies
it's a face I love
it's a face I do not know that holds my love
a face with every name
a face with no name
a face I may not even recognize
it's every sad song
it's every hate song
it's every drug that does not work
it's every person who hardens my soul


a lot like love

welcome to place
where dream is bordering on empty
a labyrinth of false hope
a tunnel of blinding happiness
be there when it breaks
feel the rush
the awareness of being reborn into oblivion
it's a lot like living
the anticipation, the purest joy
the heartbreak that follows
pushing into a dark place
spiraling on sadness
until there is nothing but empty
it's a lot like love actually

coming down

long island blended
with ecstasy, happy hour extended
and you stood by me
to heaven and hell and back our journey suspended
as closing time arriving
oh the comedown of the morning

and you left me
with a profound sadness that hurts beyond repair

come back to me my music of the night
let me live in delusional ecstasy
and hold on to your delusional love
let me dream, let me float
in a make-believe heaven
until the day I burn in hell

overdosed

pins and needles
not the kind of pain that hurts
but when linger,
utter discomfort

I dream in colors
glorifying in psychedelia
the trueness of beauty
but what does beauty mean?
as the only way to soak up its energy
is to let myself bleed
tortured by the thorns

but it will be worth it
because when I lose my sight on such beauty
I would lose my mind
so let me bleed

my beautiful secret

if only I could tell the world
how life in color really feels
a feast to the eye, sweet to the taste
as if we live in endless summer
texture of laughters
contrast with strokes of tenderness
revealing the most beautiful color
the most beautiful form
of moments words fail to explain
as you reach out to me
waking up all my senses
I long for you as if possessed
and the night celebrates with the stars
a twinkle in your eye, playful like a child
and you have me, all of me, insanely
we belong to the night of dreams
and fiery passion
and you fill me, every part of me
immensely, completely